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Your (ir)regular bad joke

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Mar
26th
Wed
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A blonde was on vacation and driving through Darwin . She desperately wanted to take home a pair of genuine crocodile shoes but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle on prices” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, Well
then, maybe I’ll just go out and catch my own crocodile, so I can get a pair of shoes for free”

The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, “Little lady, just go and give it a try”!

The blonde headed out toward the river, determined to catch a crocodile!

Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he pulls over to the side of the bank
where he spots the same young woman standing waist deep in the murky water, shotgun in hand.
Just then, he spots a huge 3 metre croc swimming rapidly toward her.

With lightning speed, she takes aim, kills the creature and hauls it onto
the slimy banks of the river. Lying nearby were 7 more of the dead creatures, all lying on their backs. The shopkeeper stood on the
bank, watching in silent amazement. The blonde struggled and flipped the Croc onto its back.

Rolling her eyes heavenward and screaming in great frustration, she shouts out…….


“SH!T, SH!T, SH!T, THIS ONE’S BAREFOOT, TOO”!
— Erich’s Emporium of Eery Ebullience
Mar
20th
Thu
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What type of fish has a good ear?


A piano tuna.

— Nebuchadnezzar’s Nefarious Nest of Nonsense
Mar
19th
Wed
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I phoned up the Johannesburg Zoo and asked to speak to Joe Raaf.

They hung up on me again…

— Chris’s Crazy Collection of Charming Chortles
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My Dog Has No Nose.

How Does He Smell?

Terrible!

— Al’s Archive of Awesome Anarchic Alliteration
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Good Night around the world …

HOLLAND:
Goeden nagt

AUSTRALIE:
Night Mate

USA:
Goodnite

DUITSLAND:
Släfin si wöl

SUID AFRIKA:
Is die deure gesluit, die vensters toegemaak,die kar ingetrek en die alarm
geaktiveer?
Is die Rotweilers losgemaak?
Lekker slaap, moenie worry nie, Eskom sal die ligte afsit!

— Doug’s Den of Dirigible Delights
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What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh

— Shaan’s Shack of Salacious Smirks
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What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?

A stick

— Shaan’s Shack of Salacious Smirks
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Rhoda’s Rumbunctious Rollicking Rabble Rouser Roost

Rhoda’s Rumbunctious Rollicking Rabble Rouser Roost

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How do you know when there’s an elephant in your fridge?


Footprints in the butter

— Tony’s House of Guffaws
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What do you get when you cross a pirate with a robot?

ARRRR 2D2

— Rhoda’s Chuckles Symposium